Even when...

 

I knew this week would be a lot.
Super Bowl, Valentine’s Day, Ash Wednesday, Baby Shower at work.
We’ve got to fit it all in, these moments are important.
We’ve got to appreciate what it means to be alive and in love and human.

We won!!! We jumped and cheered! Champs… again!...
“I’m thinking about taking the kids to the parade,” he says as my heart sinks.
So many people, what if they get separated, or have to potty?
I’d rather you not.

As it turns out, a fever meant everyone had to stay home. Exhale…
I head to work, peaking at the parade they are live streaming in the cafeteria.

We set out the cookies and await the adorable coworker who is about to pop.
“Sounds like there was an active shooter at the parade,” someone says as my heart sinks.
We smile and celebrate new life while we anxiously peek at our phones, how many lives lost?

“At least 8 children shot” the broadcaster announces as I drive home.
“Children’s Mercy is treating children whose parents can’t find them.”
I can't wrap my mind around it. I shudder.

I spent the weekend prepping cookies and cards, but not my heart. Not for this.

I pause before I pulling in the garage, grateful for a fever that kept them home.
I text my girlfriends. We exchange digital hugs through words and heartbreak.
My kids, unaware of the today’s news, smile when I walk in. “Mom!”

I knew this week would be a lot.
I’ve got to fit it all in, these moments are important.
I’ve got to appreciate what it means to be alive and in love and human.

Even when I’m heartbroken. Even when it hurts.